Hello, My name is Trapped-in-Hell, and I started this blog to vent (safely)....
This is to 'enlighten' people how to respond to those in acute/chronic pain, with no hope of recovery...only facing a slow, agonizing death....someday....hopefully soon....This will not be a candy-coated, namsey-pamsey, fucking sugar-coated blog...So, if you want that...MOVE ON! This is about REAL PAIN (not only physically but emotionally) that cannot be dealt with through 'therapy'! How can ANYONE even remotely think they can understand 'pain' when they haven't EXPERIENCED IT!?? GAWD!! GIVE me a FUCKING BREAK! Or, 2, or 3, or try thousands!
Degernerative Bone/Spinal Disease....sounds so neat and tidy....then LOOK at the x-rays and MRI's. Where do I even fucking START? There's basically not a bone literally that is NOT AFFECTED by this demon. Even when not moving, just trying to breathe (cause it hurts so much to even breathe)every bit of my entire body screams in pain...even after taking what the pain management center calls 'pain-releif' medications...FIVE types...three-four times every day...and my body is still screaming at me....after the epidurals, nerve blocks, whatever...nothing but, pain unending....
Then, the doctors have the balls to sit there and say they do not want me to become 'addicted' to drugs...??? What the FUCK is that about?? How can one 'become addicted' when the fucking meds aren't helping ANYWAY?? GAWD! Are they ALL FUCKING BRAIN-DEAD?? I would LOVE for the same docs to be in this type of constant unending pain....just to see WHAT they would DO!! Maybe IV of morphine?? Probably MORE than that! Cause morphine doesn't TOUCH this pain...so trash that shit!
You may say by now, "God bless you...." PLAEESEEE...don't GO THERE! One of my friends emailed stating it was 'wrong' of me to consider suicide because we're so close to Easter, and must remember the intense pain and suffering Jesus endured for our sins, yada, yada, yada.....yeppers! Made me feel like shit for awhile.... Till the damm pain screamed at me again...so, I took the g-- and went in the bathroom....wouldn't you just FUCKING KNOW it....the damm BUL--T fell-the-fuck OUT of the DAMM G--! GEESH! Can't even sh--t my DAMM SELF! Ain't that the shits?? (GAWD! I hope the damm ATF isn't reading this...that's ALL I fucking NEED...'intervention'...my ASS! Edited to prevent their saving-grace!)
Next, I received an email from someone saying their poor BIL, 34 yrs. old, is in the hospital and had 3 surgeries on his back to remove spinters, and may never walk again...NO! I didn't email her back offering him some of MY SPINTERS since he lost all his!
When she ended by saying, "I pray you get better soon..." I came here, and started this blog...better than what my REPLY to her would have been!